It's strange to think how much domesticity changes you.
I've lived with Justin for a year now, and boy do I wish we had a dishwasher (human or machine). It's funny how just a few plates and spoons seem to multiply into towering piles of dishes, into something else "to be done" when I get back from teaching or class. How is it that suddenly there is so much more to be cleaned up, floors to be swept, dust to be vacuumed now that there are 2 of us? I don't remember doing all this housework when I lived alone! Is there some unwritten law of cohabitation that automagically multiplies the mess and possessions when 2 people live together? Hmmm, I'd like to see that equation thank you very much. Hmmph
What's worse is I think I'm becoming a sober, responsible adult. Why? It's been months since I've thought of going out. Can you imagine? I don't even lurk here anymore to see who's playing when and where...Not till this afternoon when my brats handed in their papers and my quarter ended. Not till then did I think, mmmaybe I should go out. I feel like going out. When was the last time I went out. When did I go dancing last? Well, you know when? Last fucking year!
What's happening to me? I look at the archives and see all my impassioned posts from last year and think what died inside of me that quenched that fire? Was it ever there? Am I just posing or playing out a role for myself? What does that say about who I am?
I think this is all brought on because it's my birthday next week. 24 years old and in many ways my family still treats me like a child. Ah well...
I have such a fear of being boring but I think that's precisely what I have become.
Damn.
posted by WM @ 15:44
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